
No Meetings…
Fall Break is here, and boarding school families finally get to see their child! Here are some tips to shape how we share the time together.
Family always comes first. Spend time together as a family, especially since we have been apart for so long. Get a good meal together. Do something fun. Enjoy each other’s presence. This is the first fall break, so just chill out. Don’t turn it into a work session. Don’t visit universities. Avoid turning the conversation into a “board meeting;” we don’t need our CEO to report his/her last quarter’s performance.
…Just Get Talking!
Instead, just talk. Get to know what has been going on in our child’s life. Talk about everything, not just academics.
- How is the food at school? What do they cook best? Do you guys get to eat out over the weekends? With whom do you usually eat?
- Who are your new friends? What are their backgrounds? What do they like? What do you guys do together?
- How are you getting along with your roommate? What do you guys do together? Have you guys started getting on each other’s nerves yet, haha?
- How are you doing at sports? What are your teammates like? How is the coach? How has your team been faring against other schools?
- Outside of sports, what else have you been doing at school?
- What do you guys do over the weekends? Where have you guys visited so far?
- How many hours have you been sleeping each night? How many hours do your friends get to sleep each night too?
- How strict or not strict is the lights-out policy at night? What sort of dorm duties have you taken on so far?
- What is your advisor like? What does s/he talk about in the weekly advisory sessions? What are your fellow advisees like?
- What is your favorite subject? Who is your favorite teacher? Why?
- What is your most challenging subject? How challenging was it? How did you get through it?
- What are your classmates like? How are they different from your classmates back home?
- How differently do teachers now teach? How are you graded in each course?
- …and finally, don’t be afraid to simply let the conversation flow. You might be surprised what comes up!
Open Ears & Open Eyes
The above is simply a set of icebreakers to jump-start a conversation with our child. They are meant for us to collect pertinent data upon which we, parents, can then begin to make sense of the life our child is going through. However, it is not the data but the way the data are presented that is more relevant. By observing how our children share their journeys, we begin to see how they view themselves, their relationships with others, and, ultimately, their place in this world. We begin to see how their values evolve over time and how our little ones turn into independent young men and women. All this starts off with just… talking.
Enjoy the talks with your child!
-Daniel
Please share this post with any other parent who might also be interested in this type of content. All boarding school parents are invited and encouraged to join our Boarding School Moms Support Group on WhatsApp.